1. Run: v.tr. To travel over on foot at a pace faster than a walk

[wizzard_plz]

Voice Post

Oh shit! Oh shit! Oh shit!

I'm going to die!

Oh shit!

Splash!

...

Maybe not.

Splash!

Oh. You're here, too.

[ooc: And welcome Rincewind to the City. He has just landed in the fountain, followed closely by the Luggage. For those who don't know the Luggage, it appears to be a rather battered wooden trunk. Until it stands up and you see hundreds of little human-ish feet.]

Comments

[killerdimples.livejournal.com]

[looks down warily at the Luggage]

Um, no, I probably don't. I probably smell a lot more like...

Where have I heard the words Ankh-Morpork before?

[failed-wizard.livejournal.com]

[looks hopeful] Preceding the words "free guarded coach to...?"

[the Luggage manages to do a sterling job of staring up at him eyelessly]

[killerdimples.livejournal.com]

...do you know some kind of stuffy guy obsessed with justice named...Vines? Vimes?

[failed-wizard.livejournal.com]

[pauses to think and then shakes his head] Ankh-Morpork is a big city and I prefer to stay in the University when I can.

[killerdimples.livejournal.com]

Okay, I think I heard him saying he was from there.

Anyway. It doesn't really matter, because for now...

...[looks at the Luggage a touch anxiously]...well, you're stuck here.

[failed-wizard.livejournal.com]

[sighs] Of course I am. That means someone or a whole bunch of someones are going to try to kill me soon. [looks wholeheartedly morose before brightening slightly]

Do you have potatoes here?

[killerdimples.livejournal.com]

Not unless you're pretty good at pissing off vampires, although they were sort of kicked in the ass recently.

[pauses and digests the question]

Yeah, we do.

[failed-wizard.livejournal.com]

My mere existence seems to be enough to piss off things with sharp teeth.

[said despondently before perking up as though Lee had just told him that there were naked dancing girls available for your convenience]

Oh good.

[killerdimples.livejournal.com]

Right.

So what do you do?

...we need to find you a place to stay.

[failed-wizard.livejournal.com]

I served as Unseen University's Deputy Librarian? Do you have a wizard's university? Preferably with an orangutan for a librarian?

[killerdimples.livejournal.com]

No wizard's university, but lots of wizards that hang around...and a Library with a dream for a librarian.

Do either of those help you?

[failed-wizard.livejournal.com]

They're fat, robed, talk a lot?

[killerdimples.livejournal.com]

The second two. Most of them aren't actually that fat.

[failed-wizard.livejournal.com]

Two out of three means headaches. Right. And the library's run by a dream.

Do the books bite? Only I can manage angry books.

[killerdimples.livejournal.com]

You'll have to ask Lucien, I haven't spent a lot of time there.

Do you want me to take you there now? He doesn't ever close the place, and he's a pretty nice guy, from what I've seen.

[failed-wizard.livejournal.com]

This isn't some ruse to take me to an alchemists to sell me for parts, right?

[killerdimples.livejournal.com]

I'm not going to sell you for parts.

The alchemists here aren't into that, really.

[failed-wizard.livejournal.com]

That's what they all say.

[finally puts on his soggy hat with "Wizzard" barely recognizable in manky sequins and stitching and steps out of the fountain, the Luggage trailing on his heels like a well-trained rottweiler]

Okay then, let's see the library.

[killerdimples.livejournal.com]

Sure thing.

[failed-wizard.livejournal.com]

So... what is this place? Is it a prison? You said I couldn't leave.

Whatever it is, I didn't do it.

[killerdimples.livejournal.com]

Well...

Okay. I've heard people say it's a nexus of reality, where a bunch of realities converge. Sometimes, people can get out - I got out, but the City pulled me back [he pauses, like he caught himself in a mistake, but goes on] - but if you die here you're stuck.

Oh, and every few days there's a curse.

[failed-wizard.livejournal.com]

[droops]

Oh. One of those.

Damn.

And of course there are curses. There have to be curses.

But there are potatoes.

[killerdimples.livejournal.com]

Really a fan of those potatoes, aren't you?

[failed-wizard.livejournal.com]

You'd be amazed how many places don't have them.

[killerdimples.livejournal.com]

Really? They seem so common.